Wednesday, March 6, 2019

LESS IS LESS & MAYBE THAT'S OK

Life can be beautifully simple
Less isn’t more; it’s really less. A friend and I were chatting and I commented that less is not more. He applauded stating he was so grateful I stated that truth. What people really mean when they comment that less is more is that the eye can only see so much at one time. In the world of design, we can fool the eye to believing a space is more expansive than it is, draw the eye up or down, all based upon colours, shots of material and decor. Things too busy can become dizzying to look at. In our old Edwardian, we had many sitting rooms and loads of tchotchkes. In our new home, which is a modern, all the stuff had to be paired down significantly or eradicated prior to moving because it was not right for the new place. It wasn't meshing well with the new us. We wanted a pad all one level so all the pets and family could be all on one floor. Pairing things down meant more space between stuff, giving the eye a rest. Having space make things easier to clean as well. And as you build up your interior with decor pieces, you find the truly great items really stand out when they have some room to say something. Less is more.
I'll be 59 this year. Creating some space, making things easier to clean and not having to do a bee dance or agility course to get from one room of the house to another, make sense...makes peace.

Then I was laid off suddenly. Here's the thing with the whole less is more bit....When you feel wealthy, feel at least comfortable, there's food on the table, good food, and fluffy pillows on your nice sofa, you have a bit of discretionary income for the things, yoga class, pottery, the housekeeper, chef school, that you really want to include into your lifestyle, then it gets easier to spout on about how less is more. When you feel needy, feel like you may not get all that you want, is when the tendency is to fill your surroundings with more stuff.
My knee-jerk reaction to suddenly having my contract terminated was to get re-employed corporately swiftly as possible with an offer my Contractor brought to me the same day I was let go. That work, sadly, didn't materialize and then I spiraled. I'm not used to marketing myself or being out of a job. I am used to being in the top 10% at whatever company I work for at whatever job I do. I excel at working with people and love to help solve problems. If only I could bet my arse into a new job. I began having nightmares about this job loss and between the overly long hours at a company I worked at for 28 years and this latest that actually forgot to tell me when I was laid off so I continued working at a job I no longer had, I decided perhaps I am done with corporate work. I had just traded in my paid for car so I had a car payment. After a couple of months where I didn't see a new job on the horizon, I cashed in that car in at the dealership. Not having a car in Dallas is not an easy thing at all.
I'd love to segue into this blog, helping folks detox their daily lives, get them using the amazing organic products and help a few animals each week with my massage therapy practice and call it my new life. I don't require 10k/mo but 5k would be nice. Building this business has taken a lot of time and expense to get up and going. I went from 10k/mo to my $576.00 pension and whatever I sell. So it is with my new situation that I have begun to think about frugality and how less isn't more at all, it's freaking less for pete's sake! But having less may not necessarily be a bad thing. It’s our nature to assume whatever is happening currently, for better or worse, is the way of it. If you’re up high on life right now, the feeling is that this will never end. This high will always be. Conversely, if you're doubled over in agony, having a pity party on the epic scale, it, too seems to be far more permanent than it actually is as life’s magic twists and turns leaving tendrils of joy, pain, loss, hope, attainment and finally transcendence.
There can also be too much clutter in our heads, in our thoughts. As we clutter our lives with spent magazines, empty cups and too much of even the very nicest of things, we can overfill our heads where there isn't space or room to quietly contemplate.

Lives and situations change. Also what we can label good or bad really are just experiences and how we choose to classify them. Things are not always as they appear. It is important to be grateful and see all the blessings around you, even in the face of adversity. Whether you are downsizing on purpose or a decision was made for you, take a look around and see where you can scale back so that
as you build up your interior fortitude, with careful meditation on your next steps, you'll find the truly great ideas really stand out when they have some room to say something. Less is more.

Friday, March 1, 2019

Diluting Your Message - Why You Do What You Do

I'm a plant-based lifestyle coach and my focus is on helping people detox. I took my studies with Hippocrates Health Institute so my guidance is based upon that as a cornerstone. Heading into veganism I was way out of my element at first. But I had already detoxed my makeup bag, personal care and home care 2 decades ago so that bit was easy. What wasn't, was trying to educate others about these toxic dangers and also provide them fully researched clean, potent and pure options. Now that I was a coach, I wanted to incorporate a holistic practice that wasn't just about food but the overall lifestyle which is also what Hippocrates and I agree adamantly on. In researching products I could promote with clients, I became a Brand Partner for what I believe to be the top 3 certified organic companies that offer partnerships or affiliations and downstream business opportunities for me and my clients who are also passionate about health and the planet and animals. A friend suggested that by scattering myself between these 3 organizations, I am diluting my message. I don't see it that way. I see it as providing clean options to my clients and staying fresh and unbiased. Rather than align with and be wholly loyal to one company, I don't believe any one company can do everything, so I am loyal to my brand, to PureTemple and what she represents. But this comment stuck with me so I wanted to put it out here.
Most of us must work for a living and it can be tricky to align our goals, ethics to the need for monetary sustainment. This blog is about the whole body, holistic wellness so if your spirit isn't right, that throws the entire system out of whack. Whether the role you do today is temporary or a more permanent one, or in my case where I thought Sprint was temporary back in the early '80s but ended up working 28 years there, what spirit we take into our day truly matters because not everything is as it seems. Even temporary place holders can be magical places to be.
Honoring wherever you are by acceptance and a willingness to learn is key to moving onward. My husband is in management. Folks these days don't even give notice when they decide to stop working there, they just no call, no show. I would never dare be that disrespectful because I would prefer to pay goodness forward and never be saddled with the negative karma of purposeful rudeness and lack of empathy. I have seen some weird stuff in my time and you just never know who you will eventually cross paths with so some proactive diligence and attention are very important. Taking the high road leads to peace.
Wherever you are, what you are doing shouldn't only be a paycheck, it should in some way align with your morals. If you're vegan, adore animals but work in a slaughterhouse, that is going to be a rough sell, wearing you down and out. Hardening yourself to the truth will also wear you down and out. A friend of mine believes in reincarnation where we get new bodies and try this earthly stuff all over again, after having made plans and agreements ahead of time that we work out on this plane of existence in as many new bodies as it takes. If we get it right, we move onward and upward. If we don't, we are right back to square. The Buddha teaches that this life is pain. When you think about it, that is true. No matter what greatness you achieve in this life, no matter what joys, eventually you are smacked hard with pain. It is a part of this world. I was taught the pain of this world is due to the fall of man. But while some rest upon that and tend to cause more pains than necessary, I actively pursue avoiding unnecessary pain both for myself and others by trying hard to be proactive and diligent in my care. While we will not completely know the truth of spiritual matters on this plane, we can see good and evil at play, we can dial into our moral compass which is God-given and understand that on some level what we do matters as our actions ripple out into the universe of things.
I have gradually learned that it is only with an open mind, that I am able to add to my body of knowledge. When I think I know all the truth of a topic, that is when I let go of an opportunity to be better enlightened.
Never lose sight of the opportunity to learn. A couple of decades ago, I left Sprint to work for one of its' (and my) customers, LabCorp where, as a telecom manager, I was privy to the workings and failings of my old competition. I got to see first hand how ATT, MCI and other smaller players dropped the ball hard while Sprint had a real team behind its clients. After a couple of years, I returned to Sprint and commented that where I once saw our foibles, how we perhaps lost an account to our competition, I now saw, and from a clients perspective, how much we brought to the table.
I adore the saying where you stand depends upon where you sit as it is so true. This is why we all need to sometimes shift positions. It is exactly for this reason that I have shifted careers and am loyal to myself, to my agenda rather than one company or product.
What is your agenda? Other than getting paid, do you love helping people, calming tense situations or making folks laugh? Whatever you do, find some joy and your superpower in it. Coming from my typically long hours as a Project Manager over Implementations, I get that most folks don't have the time, inclination or energy to double check themselves at every purchase, read every label and be equipped with the knowledge to actually understand what that label is telling them. People are still buying deodorants with aluminum, still getting toxic toothpaste from their dentist, buying toxic laundry soaps and house cleaners and wearing unnatural petrochemical clothing. The average person applies/ingests 200 chemicals by 9am just in getting ready for their day. My agenda is changing all that because I lost my entire immediate family to cancer. Enough with this darkness, let's get out into the light and make things better! What, deep down, is your leading agenda and how do you incorporate that goal into every day living for yourself?
Who are you loyal to? Nix the Myopia. What and whom are you loyal to and why? You should be able to clearly define your answer and it should be deeper than earning a paycheck. Loyalty is a good thing, and I am saddened to see loyalty crash and burn in Corporate America these days as employees are tossed aside like empty take out cartons. Loyalty should not be misplaced. People get misled and companies can change direction. Remain aware of where your fielty lies. I see misplaced loyalty all the time over money. Most folks believe what they are sold/told and either don't understand or have the time to take the deeper dive into what it is they are really selling. I was a Brand Partner with a company whom I was told was all natural and chemical free. I know my upline really wanted to believe the lies, however, I began ordering their products because I could not get full disclosure on ingredients otherwise. With the products came full disclosure on all ingredients and much of it was toxic, full of chemicals and synthetics. I raised the flag and heard crickets not action. No shock no outrage no 'Yes, I see that now, let me look because I want to help my people live truly cleaner lives.' With whatever you do for work, try to keep an open mind and do your research rather than sell something less than which slowly erodes your soul.
Be Loyal to You. Here's the problem; People put all their energy into one place, and can lose sight of themselves, their reason for being there. At the end of the day you have yourself and what you have done. I was taught not to put all my eggs into one basket as a child. And this made a whole lotta sense to me. Sure, you don't want to get too scattered, but you do want to create new opportunities for growth and minimize your downstream risks. I work in Multi-Level Marketing. When one of my MLMs turned out to be not so natural, I immediately stopped promoting all but 2 decent products. And there went that revenue I was building. But I am loyal to an end goal of detoxing peoples lives so I must honor that. This is what I mean by being loyal to you, to what guides you and never compromise this. Never be comfortable just because you are earning money. End of Last May, I was earning 10k a month in the corporate sector. It was great. I was working an 8 hour day after over 17 years of thousands of non-paid overtime hours that affected my health so I was absolutely in heaven, loved learning something new, helping people, having my time back and earning a fair paycheck. Layoffs were not discussed. Even worse, I was not even told when my job ended because folks forgot to tell me I was laid off. I came to work the next day and started working at a job I no longer had. I mattered that bloody much. I had just bought a new car with a hefty car payment and begun a to the studs master bathroom remodel. Had there been even a whisper of contractors being laid off potentially these are two things I would NOT have started as I moved into a new year at this company and thought I had at least a 2-year contract. Within the week of my sudden departure, one of my friendly co-workers read the signs and booty scooted too! She got the upper hand jump and with her mad skills got employed swiftly elsewhere. Sure, you may have a primary basket, but don't put all of your eggs there. Build up other baskets, safety nets, revenue streams. I see with folks that people feel committed to remaining in something because it is familiar, they have built a team camaraderie, they are earning comfortably. But few companies are loyal these days to anything but their bottom line. They no longer even pretend to care about you. Ps, you were laid off yesterday, pack your shit up.
Why the tendency to keep all our eggs into one basket? If you really love the team you work with, you can always invite them into your new gig. The band can get back together again. If it doesn't, then a higher purpose is being served so don't worry about it. Keep yourself focused on what truly matters for your plan. Don't be afraid to go off grid, off-roading. The worst that can happen is you will learn what works, what doesn't and something about yourself you didn't know before.
Nix DEBT and leave your stones behind. We all have bills but I want to caution about cash flow because not living your financial life in balance can mean an ethics slip or just flat working someplace you really would rather not just to pay the man. A friend going through a rough time a couple of years ago was really struggling with big decisions during a divorce. She was taking a very high road. I admired the path she was attempting, the elevation was very high so I applauded this, however, I myself would have definitely been throwing down some boulders along that high path of hers and stated as much. Well, I am very good sometimes at telling people what to do, not that they ever listen, but I do try. And sometimes I should simply shut up. My friend was stressed. She needed to vent not be told what to do, she was a full on adult capable of making her own smart decisions. I suddenly had the right thing to say to her and I have kept this question alive ever since because it applies to so much that we ever go through. When contemplating decisions, ask yourself 'If I do that, will it bring me ultimately closer or farther away from peace?' We can get edgy and jumpy and just want to think about right now, this moment, that shiny car or cute kitten but this question is a keeper. It keeps me focused on what truly matters and it will help you too. As we create ripples with every action we take, isn't a focus on what brings us the greatest ultimate peace a great way to look outside ourselves and any immediate agenda into selflessness, into deeper matters?

What's your slogan? Whether you work for yourself or a company, you are also a brand. How you engage with others every day helps create that brand, the brand of YOU! At Sprint I worked with a great manager, Scott Willis, who was responsible for giving me the opportunity to be an IPM. His slogan was 'Where there's a Willis, there's a way.' He lived up to that slogan. I want to make money but I never want that to become the main driver for why I do this work. I also want to spark others to question their motivations behind doing what they do as well so I created a slogan last year: If what you do for a living pollutes the earth, harms animals or people, then it’s not worth the effort or any amount of paper.’ This is on the signature line of all my emails. It helps me focus on how I can take my knowledge and apply that in the best service of my clients. It helps me to remain honest with my intentions and ever be humble I am able to do this work. As I build the brand, my brand, PureTemple, dedicated to learning and sharing ways to save our planet and detox our daily lives. I hold my goals in focus, progressively pursuing enlightened living. As you hone and manage your personal slogan, know that nothing is ever static. All of us are changing, evolving. Who you are today is not who you were yesterday. We learn from yesterday simply to inform a better future. Be blessed. ♥

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

Spun Out, Stressed Out?

It's a common occurrence in our too fast-paced lives that most of us lead, to feel a bit edgy or 'stressy' on occasion. But when you find yourself feeling this way daily and perhaps without even knowing why can be diet or nutrition related.  Lifestyle is so important.  How we live, combined with how we take care of ourselves adds up to a longer life with more vitality in it.
Firstly, no matter how cleanly you eat, we all need some kind of supplementation.  Since 85% of the supplements out to market are bad and bad for you, it's important to read labels, align yourself with folks you trust (me) listen to your body, honor your feelings and give yourself the necessary support.  Not doing so ages you faster as it reduces your current life quality.
I have a very enlightened MIL (Mother In Law).  My SIL (Sister In Law) is pretty groovy too.  Visiting my MIL a few months back, she was very on edge and commented that she didn't really know why was just chalking it up to age. I asked her if she was perhaps taking any magnesium because she was upset, felt very on edge and yet there wasn't a logical cause to her upset.  I began talking about Natural Vitality Calm and ran down to the guest room to get her one.  Turns out she was familiar with them, had taken them in the past and just like I think we all do, got off track, forgot about them and found herself in need, out of balance.   Sort of like that Snickers commercial where you aren't feeling like yourself?  But rather than reach for sugar, which is ultimately very bad for you, supplement with vitality. This powder, which comes in a jar and on the go packets, works great.  Magnesium is important for supporting calcium in the body.  Great for sleep or relaxation, it can be the ally you need when working on a stressful project, or perhaps if you don't have an enlightened MIL.  :)  Healthy levels of Magnesium support your immune system and bones as well as blood pressure and sugar levels.
You can be low on Magnesium because of a strenuous workout, stress, taking cortisone (please avoid, this is NOT a good thing to do for your body go get acupuncture instead) too much calcium (which can also cause stones) as well as GI disorders.  This brand is cruelty-free, Vegan, Organic, All Natural, Non-GMO, and Gluten Free.

Another great support system to implement into your lifestyle is superfoods.  I market 2 kinds; one that has seaweed/algae and one that doesn't. I have a couple of clients who don't want to do sea veggies so both are great options for resilient health.
Now, I get folks who tell me they are just looking for a green drink, something to alkalize.  But I believe in the trifecta approach to wellness because when the body is fed, the mind is eased and we are less stressed more balanced.
This pack, Miessence Vitality Pack!, Provides you with a full on 30-day support system. When purchased as a pack, the cost is reduced plus you can get up to a 40% discount based upon your spend so there's always an opportunity to save.  I like to mix the trio into a smoothie on smoothie days. To warm up, I enjoy mixing the Red into a delicious vegan hot cocoa with water, a bit of stevia and nut milk.  All can go well into a juice or water.  The Deep Greens is delicious mixed in with dressing for salad.
The combined alkalizing, probiotic, and antioxidant nutrients in the Vitality Pack are a concentrated source of super nutrition that offers major benefits to your entire body.  80% of our immunity is in our gut.  And if our gut isn't right, our mood is not going to be either.
In-Liven – Contains 26 naturally fermented organic whole foods to help recolonize the gut with beneficial bacteria. Fermented foods are one of the keys to longevity.
Berry Radical – anti-aging from the inside! Our skin is the outer layer which should always be protected. Adding a chemical free moisturizer is a great way to shield against free-radical damage and pollution.  But this gives you beautiful skin from the inside! The antioxidant equivalent of over 8 servings of fruits and veggies in one delicious beverage.
DeepGreen – balance your body pH with a super-concentrated source of alkalizing, mineral-rich, green algae, grass juices and leafy greens.   Minerals are so important and most folks are deficient in them.  As we age or over whiten our teeth, we can have issues where the teeth crumble and weaken.  This is why.
Essante offers land-based superfoods for anyone who is sensitive to water veggies. Both Earth Greens and the fruity Super Reds are a 3 month supply and 5.5 lbs. of organic, whole food nutrition per serving!  There's also a daily digestive and patented probiotic.
I am also a HUGE fan of yoga.  Yoga is one exercise that is truly a practice that marries the mind, the spirit and the body for a very calming introspective work out as you take a spiritual journey too.
FULL DISCLOSURE: As a Plant-based coach, passionate about saving the planet, saving the animals and saving us,  I have aligned myself with Amazon because they sell most anything.  I think you can buy a soul on Amazon, really.  So this way I can provide you with easy links to get more information or purchase if you like.  I am also a brand partner for eco-friendly, carbon Neutral organic products that I use myself. I fully vet everything I discuss to bring us all closer to limiting toxins in our environment and aiding our bodies in their attempts to daily detox and release the body burden we all have.
I welcome comments!  If you have found something that helped you out, kindly share my blog and report back to help others.




Saturday, December 29, 2018

Inflammation - Resolution

People ask me all the time about reducing Inflammation - Whether this is arthritis or from an injury or general internal discomfort and swelling, inflammation is the body's way of dealing with stress. Inflammation is a precursor to cancer. There are several ways to remove or reduce inflammation in the body which will result in better mobility, less pain. Less cancer risk.  And when it comes to your organs and gut health, better comfort and assimilation of nutrients, less gas and bloating and weight loss.
Miessence Super Foods

Eliminate sugar - This one is difficult I know. From pasta to wine, sugar is plentiful. Cancer loves sugar. Reduce inflammation with a daily intake of Blue Green algae, chia, hemp, flax seeds as well as primrose oil and fizner oil. Copper water aids in balancing the 3 doshas, Kapha, Vata and Pitta, reduces inflammation, respiratory disorders, spleen, and gynecological disorders, skin diseases and get rid of piles (Hemorrhoids). An easy way to add copper is by placing purified water into a copper pitcher and leaving it overnight. Copper also helps with premature graying of hair by drinking water treated this way. Turmeric reduces tumor cell growth, minimizes inflammation in the body.
Let's talk about Superfoods. I sell this stuff. I'm a brand partner for two organic companies who are eco and animal-friendly.  Before I sign on with anyone, I fully vet them, their ingredients, (are they organic or wildcrafted) how they process their product, (is there heat applied that would denature the product) and how often are batches made (has it been sitting on a shelf a decade already).  Folks, if you are buying non-organic, you are ingesting pesticide and GMO plants.  You are worth getting the best.  And my slogan is 'If what you work at harms people, animals or the planet, it's not worth any efforts or any amount of money.'  I came up with this in thinking about a friend I had turned onto my plant-based products to earn extra income and she immediately signed up with Mary Kay (toxic). I can only assume to make more money but while money is terrific, I LOVE shopping and feathering my MCM home and I also love fast cars too...it is not worth losing your soul over.
When we think about our genetics, do you realize that only 10% is you and the other 90% is all the microbiota that you are a host for? Yes, our gut is a living (or should be) world for good bugs, the microbiome.
Good plant-based, cold processed, certified organic, supplements made with care are not going to be cheap but they are so worth it.  If you're used to buying non-organic mass-produced synthetic crap this stuff is on an entirely different level of quality.  95% of supplements on the market are bad for you, contain fillers, are synthetic rather than plant-based. If you are taking fish oils for your omegas, know that fish get that from plants, from sea algae. And all fish is toxic these days, with mercury and plastics and pharmaceutical drugs.  There was a recent report on pets getting sick as pet parents have gotten on the bandwagon of giving their dogs omegas.  Skip the fish oil. Bad supplements do nothing but cause harm and are cheap to make. You're going to pay for quality.  On the upside, there are volume discounts and free shipping with this great product! Look in your shopping cart as you add items and you will see when you hit certain levels the discount increases.
Back to superfoods and why we all need this! If we still lived in the 40s, the soils would be plentiful with minerals, the plants organic and vine-ripened, bought only in season and filled with far more nutrition. A can of spinach then requires now about 15 cans to equal the iron and other minerals....to give you an idea. And, a head of lettuce loses 50% of its nutrition within the first 30 minutes of being cut. Imagine what the nutrition is once it travels on the trucks and finally makes it to the supermarket, then to your car and lastly into your fridge. Do you eat it right away or does it take you a week or longer to finally eat all the lettuce you bought...or other fruits and veggies?
What do superfoods do for you? PROBIOTIC- First, you need your gut bugs and to feed them properly too. The InLiven Superfood, based on more than 20 years of research, contains the complete Lactobacillus family of 13 strains combined with 26 certified organic whole foods naturally fermented for 3 weeks prior to bottling. A healthy intestinal tract should contain at least 85% 'friendly' bacteria to prevent over-colonization of disease-causing microorganisms which result in a large number of ailments from digestive disorders and painful joint inflammation to susceptibility to colds and flu.SUPER REDs - BerryRadical is a dark chocolate cacao delicious combination of nine of the world's most potent, antioxidant, superfoods. I use it as hot cocoa (with a bit of stevia or organic Xylitol) or put in a smoothie. What I love are no sugar type fillers. This tasty, high potency formulation gives you the antioxidant of equivalent eight servings of fruit and vegetables in every teaspoon. SUPER GREENS - Keeping the correct pH balance in our bodies is vital for ongoing good health. Failing to keep that balance can result in loss of minerals that results in reduced bone density associated with osteoporosis. A body which is too acidic has been linked to other conditions including atherosclerosis, kidney and gallbladder stones and arthritis. As with the Super Reds, there are no sugary fillers. Coming from my Hippocrates training, I also love that wheat grass and spirulina and chlorella are included.  I like to add a scoop to my salad daily.
You can save money by purchasing the Vitality tri-pack. No, not cheap but you will see/feel a difference.
I also recommend slow yoga and massage and really like the Himalayan Botanique brand muscle & joint rub. Epsom salt or Mustard baths also help.
And don't forget to be thankful to your body, for getting you through life thus far. Honor it by the best nutrition, eliminating (or reducing) processed foods, carbs/sugars.
Dairy is a huge inflammation producer. So anyone doing dairy should eliminate or go organic and drastically reduce. Casein is in all dairy and is a carcinogen. The more stressed out the cow (factory farm, just lost her baby so we could drink her milk = one very upset mama) the more casein we ingest not to mention there's puss in it....because we are not taking care of the mama, she is just a milk machine to the farmer...it's a sick and cruel industry. And it isn't healthy for us either.
The superfoods discussed above are available through my Miessence shop Miessence Super Foods
Now, there are a few folks who cannot do algae.  This is also great for folks who want a super green supplement but in quick capsule form. Let's take a look at certified organic and wildcrafted plant-based options through Essante PH Nutrition
From meal replacement shakes (like Salted Caramel and Chocolate Kiss) to probiotics (Ph Lora), Super Reds and Earths Greens.  What I like about these products is the capsule for the Earths Greens, great on the go, a high ORAC value equivalent to 5 1/2 lbs of veggies that is a fantastic product sans the algae that some folks cannot do. The probiotic has a patent on it and the Super Reds is a fruity blend with a bit of stevia in it that doesn't have a nasty aftertaste...because in general, I am NOT a stevia fan...so this is great in a bit of water on ice as well as in a smoothie.

As we move into a new year, it's natural for folks to take a review of the last 12 months, look ahead and plan next steps toward positive changes.  Take the next level in your personal health by feeding your body great detoxing anti-inflammatory nutrition. Feel free to comment or ask questions, I'm always happy to help! ♥

Friday, December 28, 2018

Trolls: Are You a Troll?

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Trolls. They're everyplace. And while the term was coined from the internet and social media posts, you'll find trolls in your general daily life, from standing in line at the supermarket to the office cubicle nearest you. And on some days....yes, you could be the troll.  Blowing out someone else's candle won't make yours glow any brighter. What’s your motivation today?  I try hard to ask myself this whenever I feel less than balanced.  I try to breathe and ask myself what I am trying to accomplish here as I type or speak.  On the Vegan 101 Page (great page btw) I encountered a troll. It’s the holidays and bound to happen. While some folks are pleased with all the happenings of 2018, some aren’t. And rather than be an adult the unhappy, the less than settled,  make the choice to share their turmoil and create drama and confusion.
Someone posted about it being ‘time to detox.’ What’s the best juicer asked someone else and I posted my article on Juicers. This turned into idiocy from one individual who essentially told me I should be ashamed for selling my quackery.  But while I DO market organic superfoods and Skincare, this post was not mine and was not anything I was selling.  I was singled out somehow for commenting on the post.  The individual had posted with a picture of green juices simply stating it was time to cleanse.  Not sure if they were selling these juices or simply stating they were getting ready to juice themselves!  So I took my leave after commenting that daily detoxing is very important.

In my corporate job, at my signature line, I asked ‘Is it kind? Is it helpful? Is it necessary? Faced daily with long hours, high heated emotions and hundreds of emails, I thought posing these questions helped temper everyone in stressful situations and mitigate unnecessary actions thus saving time and making work smoother. It was a reminder of what really matters at the end of the day.
As we move into the new year how can we maintain focus on what really matters? Can we be mindful of times we all look for ways we ignite a fire when water is needed, stomp out someone’s fire when heat is needed, or otherwise produce chaos when we could be adding unity and check our motivation for doing this? Are we feeling insecure, alone, jealous or just enjoying schadenfreude?
As an activist, I sign hundreds of petitions annually, injustices range from the Asian cat and dog meat trade to saving the whales, our oceans, eradicating the factory farm cruelties and sharing the important knowledge about what is really going on.  And there is always someone that jumps on a dog and cat meat post demanding human rights or what about dairy cruelty and is it alright to save the Asian cats and dogs but not pigs and cows.  These folks are trolls.  They jump onto a topic, snuff out the candle of the posters original intent, muck things up, accuse the poster of eating animals, call into question the organization itself (are they a real organization or a sham) then leave feeling vindicated, as if they somehow really caused some good here.   
We’re human, we stumble. But who has the time for ongoing toxicity? Where’s the joy in creating slander and cruelty? Only the imbalanced feels joy causing discord. And you cannot reason with imbalance. Let it go. As we move into the new year, look at your relationships, even those in your FB friend groups and ask yourself if they belong in your life? Do you feel supported, uplifted by most of what they say or judged and deflated? In short is what they say kind, helpful or necessary?
There’s always going to be the troll that wants to roll around and cover the facts with mud-uneducated to the truth of things, unwilling to learn with an egoist view of already knowing all. These are the folks who talk over you, don't read what you've actually said and think you're the one full of Bull hockey.  
When you already know everything learning ceases. These folks just want to get you muddy, they aren’t there to be helpful and they aren't there to be educated. They are not there to be helped or healed. Let it go. The teacher will arrive when the student is ready.
Let go of those who waste your time and mood and seek out those who uplift. You teach others how you wish to be treated by what you allow. Let go of what no longer serves your highest good and embrace positive change. Life is short. Trolls need not apply. Happy New Year!🎈

Friday, December 21, 2018

Here For The Beer?

Friends and family are so important, provided these relationships are healthy ones. These relationships help us feel bolstered, supported, less alone and enrich our lives in so many ways.   As people couple up, they tend to spend far less time with friends.  Add kids into the mix and you can feel even more estranged.  While coupling and having life sort of take over and back-seat your friends is part of the nature of things, it is also something we must be mindful of by working to carve out time for our near and dear.  Maintaining friendships and healthy relationships helps our self-esteem and keeps us balanced too.  Whether that's a monthly friend lunch or beers after work or what have you, it is important to maintain your healthy friendships.  Healthy friendships are a necessity.  But what about codependent and abusive relationships?  They can be subtle like a light breeze through a doorway or a full-on hurricane. We all need a shoulder from time to time or a shared belly laugh.  We are driven to socialize and feel communion.  But co-dependent abusive relationships are not worth time or effort. The best way to spot them is by asking yourself how you feel after an exchange with the individual. Are they so wrapped up in themselves they forget plans with you or never bother to ask how you are doing because it's all about them?
My mother came from an abusive background and it turns out we had a very codependent relationship.  And this book by Melody Beattie, Codependent No More, set me free of that.  It also ended a codependent relationship I was in with a man that exactly mirrored how my mother treated me.  For the very first time, I could see how I had played the victim and been manipulated and I could read it in 5 minutes in somebody else.  Healthy relationships always give and take and the relationships are not about getting something from you but looking out for your best interests.  Do you look out for your own best interests?
Some folks in your life, no matter how superficial or how deeply entrenched they appear to be, are just there for the beer.  And Facebook has made this far worse.  Yes, FB is great for those out of town friends and ex-colleagues to catch up with that you otherwise wouldn't or only do so very sporadically, but FB has also taken place of actually seeing people!  If you have a car and live in the same city, you should connect physically periodically and talk live, do lunch, have a glass of wine together and catch up, have real conversations that you really cannot have on FB because on Facebook, it seems that most people get on there to hear happiness and flowers. There is only a very short attention span for any real dramas.  Most aren’t on there for serious issues and private messaging is cumbersome and wordy at best. The same thing applies to Facebook that applies with emails.  Much can be lost in the translation.  The bottom line is that anyone that lives in your city that's also on FB should be able to see you a few times a year, and physically visit or it really isn't much of a real friendship, is it because much of FB is fake.  Fake news!  It's called gas and a car key if the friendship really means anything at all. With that, I want to talk about self-sabotage.
Most of us create some kind of self-sabotage from time to time, whether it’s losing it with a coworker, deliberately stretching your personal finances too tightly, dating a loser or listening too intently to the wrong people. The GREAT news is that each day provides us with abundance and opportunities to co-create change. As we end this year, think about ways of being that no longer serve your highest good. Are you trusting people that always let you down? Working at a job that perhaps pays well but drains your soul? Living someplace that depresses you rather than uplifts? Keeping what’s in your best interest at arm's length rather than embracing joy? Stuck in a rut? Feeling conflicted? My neighbor Dennis commented that he often feels misled because he assumes the way he cares for others means he gets that level of care back and that’s not always so. I’m generally an open book but one of my adult tastes of such was when I had two family members with an emotional breakdown and nobody to talk to. I reached out and was simply told ‘We don’t do well with mental illness topics.’ That couple immediately went to the balcony of our lives rather than a seat in the front row where I had thought they were well placed. I was wrong. Guard your heart and test friendships mettle. You can do this while still being open and compassionate but also judicious. Coupled with self-sabotage comes the blinders we also wear. What patterns happen for you? Are all your friendships on FB or do you have real ones?  Are those relationships truly supporting or downers? Do you find yourself always giving, such as supporting a friends shop by buying stuff but not getting any ROI?  Do you have a habit of overcommitting, promising and not delivering or is someone in your life doing this to you?  Do you keep forgetting plans or have someone who consistently forgets you?
I was laid off and had sold my car so that I would not have a car payment while being unemployed.  A friend who is well off offered to give me a good working vehicle he wasn't using and, as he put it, didn't want to bother taking it to Carmax to sell.  He said 'It's yours' and that he would bring it by that week.  I followed up with him about the car, 4 times asking if he was serious and each time he said yes.  I am still not over the fact that on FB he told everyone he had given me a car yet the reality is I am still on foot.   I cannot tell you why anyone would promise something and not deliver but I can assure you that this behavior is absolutely toxic.  I didn't ask him for anything, he just knew my situation and made a great and grand gesture.  I actually cried tears of joy.  I had bought cars for other people and never once have I had someone buy me a car in my 58 years.  How karmically sweet to finally be gifted in this manner!  And then it never materialized.
Surround yourself with people who mean what they say and follow through on promises.  Honor the good people in your life by following suit.  Don't wait for the car to show up!  Or any other empty promise! Move on!  And please respect yourself enough to never make empty offerings and end relations with those in your life who do.  When you find yourself in repeated codependent relationships, know that while you can absolutely change this by removing those blinders, it also requires some diligence, particularly in the beginning as you are learning about the old patterns, how to spot and stop them while learning new and healthy ways of being.  So in addition to the book above, I also highly recommend this daily meditation which has always seemed perfect for the day, whatever page I open it to.  Melody Beattie The Language Of Letting Go

Some people are just here for the beer.  They are there because something better has not yet come up so they are hanging out with you temporarily.  They may like your beer and may enjoy your company when it suits them but they are not filled with compassion and loyalty towards you personally when help and friendship is really needed. 

Do the same stories keep coming up in your life? If so, and you don’t like the story, change it! Where you see repeated abusive relationships or financial constraints or any other negatory pattern, there’s a spot to start working on. Honor yourself by acknowledging the needed nudge. We all have our personal pet bitches and gripes and crap that happens. As long as you’re seeking ways to minimize drama in your life ( and also drama for those around you) and working to create goodness, you’re on the right path. When you begin to see things frazzle and fray, it’s time to pour a cup of tea and reassess. This life is short. This year nearly a wrap. Live your best life in 2019.

Wednesday, December 19, 2018

Hibiscus Vegan Tacos OMG!

https://amzn.to/2R30at9
This is my taco meat using hibiscus flowers.  IF you had told me a few years ago that there was such thing as flower tacos, I would have smirked.  Perhaps smirked with a raised eyebrow.  I have drunk hibiscus tea for decades.  And when I moved to Dallas, I learned Mexicans use the flower in frescas, added to water (I add to fizzy water) for a lovely refresher on a hot day because we get those here. 
Healing Properties - From blood pressure reduction/balancing to kidney repair, like kidney stones, we know the tea is so healing.  And all this time that I have made this deliciously tart tea, I have tossed the spent flowers after brewing...but not the last time, no, not the other day when I took this photo.    What's great about this dish is that it creates both a meal and the drink! ♥  And, it's really easy.
Get the flowers - First you will want to have a lb or 2 of organic dried hibiscus flowers.  Each meal will use up a cup or 2 of dried flowers, depending on whether you are feeding an entire family or just a couple etc and how freaking hungry you are or what leftovers you want.  The link will take you to some yummy dried flowers to purchase via Amazon.  It may also be worthwhile to check out any latino grocery spots near you if you have them.  Again, I am in Dallas, we have them, Ariva!!!  Yes, absolutely, here we are Mexi-CAN!  :) 
Recipe - I'm not really a cookbook writer so this is sort of free form.  I think most of us know how to make a base taco meat.  What you will be doing here is basically the same but instead of animal meat, you will use hibiscus flowers as your meat.   A cup fed my husband and I with leftovers to do another meal.  I won't embarrass myself here by telling you how many tacos I pumped down.  They were really good.  So, take 1 or 2 cups of hibiscus flowers and rinse just to reduce any dust, put in a pot and cover with purified water.  Let it boil 10 minutes.  Now just let it sit and soften for a few hours.  (Later you can pour off the tea into a container, it will be stronger than what you are used to, so you will add water to that or ice for delicious and healthy tea. )
When you are ready to create your flower tacos, put a bit of olive oil in your saute pan, then add some cumin, some smoked paprika, chili powder, garlic, chopped  onion, add in your flower meat, tomatoes (stewed etc) and any salsa etc and doesn't it look like shredded carne?    You can also do this mole-style too...I mean, when you finally taste this, you will see how flexible it can be.



We are having tacos again for dinner....help...I can't stop....